5 of the worst Xbox One games of 2016
Forza Horizon 3. Battlefield 1. Final Fantasy XV. Rocket League. DOOM.
I could go on and on about the great games that came the way of Xbox One owners throughout 2016, but I won’t because this article isn’t about those fun bringers.
Instead it’s about those games which have failed to deliver any inkling of entertainment. The ones which have failed straight off the bat. The ones which have, without beating round the bush, been a bit crap.
So, with 2016 behind us, which were the worst Xbox One games of the year? You should be keeping well away from the following…
This is one Storm that’s gone Rogue!
On the face of it, Rogue Stormers should be pretty good. It’s got a lovely steampunk design, caters for both the solo player and those wishing to take their experience online, and plenty of rogue-like randomness to keep you going back for more.
But then, sometimes things just don’t always work out as intended and Rogue Stormers quickly begins to fail.
The random nature which should have been its main draw gets irritating, its crushing difficulty stops any real progress from being made, whilst the gameplay itself is far from engaging. It is normally about then when we drop ourselves into the safe haven of the online multiplayer world, hoping that some strangers from the other side of the globe can help us out on our quest. But Rogue Stormers online element is utterly dead – but then to be fair that is also the case for many other Xbox One indie titles. It seems that unless your name starts with a Call of… or comes with a big budget, us XO gamers just don’t want to know.
But if we did, perhaps we could see Rogue Stormers move its way off this list. But we don’t, so it can’t.
Whatever you do, DO NOT give this DOGOS a bone.
We love our shoot em ups, and had high hopes when DOGOS dropped in on Xbox One. But from the very first minute those hopes and dreams were obliterated into many little pieces, with constant grammatical errors irritating us from the off.
And once you’re on the back foot, it’s very hard, no matter how much you try, to begin to see the light of day. DOGOS just doesn’t let you forget its initial shortcomings and an unimaginative, rather stale story-line fails to excite. The repetitive music and failure to bring any real form of challenge our way also goes again DOGOS massively, leaving XO owners having to fall back on the decent voice acting and customisation options for any hope of salvaging a good time.
It also won’t take long before those credits start to roll either and when combined with a price that is a little on the steep side, DOGOS just can’t be recommended.
Professional Farmer 2017
Professional Farmer 2017 needs a trip to the abattoir.
There must be something with the farming way of life which is behind all these ‘mud and boots’ titles that have been coming to recent fruition. Not only do we have the full Farming Simulator series, but now we also have a professional offering on the table. Professional Farmer 2017 is the worst of the lot though.
It does pretty much what it says on the tin – it allows you the opportunity to go deep into the life of a farmer. But this one comes with a ton of loading screens, bugs, glitches and temperamental collisions galore. Whilst it must be said that there are plenty of things to do in Pro Farmer 2017, it says something when the in-depth tutorial is more of a draw than the actual game.
Professional Farmer 2017 went right up against Farming Simulator in an attempt to win the war of the farms, but not only did it fail to even much the average standards of its competitor, but it basically destructed from within…taking its entire livestock with it.
And that really is the ultimate farming sin.
Man, I don’t feel like a woman!
What on earth is Perfect Woman? We asked that question many times, to many different people but no-one could give us a coherent answer.
You see, after playing Perfect Woman, you’ll be left in a bit of a daze, not knowing where you’ve come from, what you’ve just done or why on earth you have done it. You’ll also be wondering how the hell Perfect Woman became an Xbox One title.
It must be said that Perfect Woman does excel in one area, and that is in regards to its motion capture – but we’ll put that one down to the awesome Kinect kit on this one. When you are relying on a piece of technology which is fast becoming redundant as the only real positive from a game, then you know you are going to be in for a rough ride.
Horse Racing 2016
The three-legged blind horse of the racing world.
Here we are with the very worst Xbox One title of 2016. Hell no, Horse Racing 2016 is quite possibly the worst Xbox One title of all time and could quite easily have been crowned champ of the 360 side if it had dared release there too.
You see, Horse Racing 2016 is, at best, an OG Xbox title…and even then we’d be ashamed to see it on our system.
Priced at £23.99, yep, that’s right, this doesn’t even come in with an indie price tag, Horse Racing 2016 is an absolute abomination of a game. It looks horrendous with visuals that shouldn’t ever be allowed on Xbox One, it’s got poor game mechanics and truly awful animations. Throw in a complete and utter boring, repetitive nature and some full on button mashing pain, and it doesn’t take long to realise that this is a game that has been delivered with one thing in mind – milking the hell out of horse racing enthusiasts.
Pound for pound, it’s the worst game we’ve ever played and for a team which has been gaming for the best part of 35 years, that’s some going!
So there we have it, five of the very worst Xbox One games which arrived throughout 2016. If you’re looking for a new game, then we advise you keep away from all of the above – unless you’ve got so much spare cash, time and life to kill and are looking for something which will make you laugh…from the sheer incompetence that they bring.
Do you agree with our list? Have we missed anything out or are we being a little harsh on Horse Racing 2016? Make sure you let us know in the comments below or on all the usual social media channels. We’d love to hear your thoughts.