HomeReviewsQ*bert REBOOTED: The XBOX One @!#?@! Edition Review

Q*bert REBOOTED: The XBOX One @!#?@! Edition Review

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If you frequented a sweaty video game arcade back in the mid 1980’s, chances are you would have stumbled upon Q*Bert, no doubt slotting 10p into his machine for the chance to experience cutting edge isometric technology. The orange guy was a bit of a star in the arcades of yesteryear and aside from a few half arsed attempts to bring the blob on legs crashing into modern times, quietly disappeared from all major video gaming circles.

Now though, Q*Bert is back and he means business. Ish.

qbert pic 1

After popping up in a couple of recent movies, albeit in roles that can’t in any way be described as ‘starring’, Q*Bert has been rebooted, rehashed and given a bit of a visual and mechanical makeover. Q*Bert Rebooted has arrived on Xbox One with the classic game sitting proudly alongside its newer, bigger, brasher, more refined younger sibling. Well, it should be bigger, brasher and more refined eh?

Yes, yes It should, and whilst it may deliver on the first two fronts, I’m not sure it’s quite as polished as the classic game was.

For those not in the know, Q*Bert needs to hop and jump his way across numerous stages in order to change the colour of the cubes which make up each level. Now, with Q*Bert Classic, this is straightforward enough. Starting at the top of a pyramid, a quick press and hold of the left stick in a diagonal fashion sends Q*Bert on his way. Dodging his way past a few enemies on the way. Coily, the purple snake who just loves to hunt Bertie down is quite possibly the most ‘famous’ of his foes, but Q*Bert will also need to safely negotiate his way past some red balls and other horrendous pieces of evil in order to flip his tiles and stay alive.

The main aim of the Classic mode is to obtain enough points in order to place yourself on the worldwide 23 man leaderboard. It’s that simple. And to be honest, a tad boring and not really worth the asking price.

qbert review pic 3

But this is where Q*Bert Rebooted comes in. Or at least it’s meant to be where Q*Bert Rebooted comes in.

Ditching the famous squares, Rebooted sees Q go off on his merry way across stages and levels created using hexagonal blocks. The premise of the game is the same as previous, with the express intention of jumping from block to block in order to change them to a specific colour. Early levels start off easy but progress in difficulty, with some tiles needing to be ‘hit’ more than once in order to obtain the correct colour. Whilst we initially get treated to the standard Q*Bert pyramid, various level shapes have been included and each one changes the tactical side of the reboot just enough to keep you wanting to play through.

Just about anyways.

With Coily, a bloody annoying cat and a few other antagonists getting in Q*Berts way, with them all either set out for his destruction or just wandering around messing with his tiles, the difficulty levels up at a decent rate and should be pretty doable to all but the most hostile gamer. There are occasions when the awkwardness ramps up inexplicably, requiring a good few tries in order to fully complete the level, but on the whole, anyone who is comfortable with a controller in their hands will be able to navigate Q*Bert safely on his way.

qbert review pic 6

Again though, that is the idea. The actual execution is slightly different.

Now, the move to include hexagons instead of squares is a decent one, opening up a bigger range of movement opportunities. But it does cause a problem. Whilst the maneuvering in the original classic game was, and still is, fluid, that found in the Reboot is sketchy at best. No longer does the left stick alone move Q*Bert around, but a press of the A button is required to ensure his jump isn’t his last. This turns the whole thing into a bit of an A button mash, ensuring Q*Bert stutters at every step. The reason for including the button hit to make the move is quite obvious. With the increase in open directions, the stick alone would no doubt see Q*Bert moving in directions that were not required. Something therefore had to be done, but whether this is the best option I’m really not sure. I much prefer the hexagonal tiles included in the Reboot, but on the same hand would die for the smoothness found in the Classic. As it is, we’re kind of at a halfway house where both work, but neither are perfect, with me yearning after one whilst at the same time wishing it were the other.

Additionally, and this goes for both versions of the game, it’s damn tricky to work out exactly where Q*Bert will be moving to, where the enemies are and exactly when they are going to spawn into place. A very brief red X notifies the player to shift Q*Bert out of harms way, but this is very very brief, giving little chance of a safe exit. This is never more true than when you come across Mr Uppercut for the first, second or 100th time. Wiping out numerous blocks in one foul swoop, if you even dare to be near a red X when he is coming out to play, then you’ll be in instant trouble…and there ain’t really an awful lot you can do about it.

qbert review pic 2

Thankfully, the Reboot gives players five lives, as opposed to the Classic’s three, before dropping you out and the way the levels are created with a new style of levels path means that dying will at least only see you needing to negotiate your way through the latest stages again.

The Reboot also gives you the chance to collect Gems, which in turn are used to unlock various skins. With the addition of a new Treasure Chest character who tries to escape Q*Bert’s reach, the option is there to pick up numerous Gems should you so wish. Whilst these are a nice touch, giving the gamer something to head for other than the usual points, time or completion plans, none of the skins do anything other than mix up the visual style. Given the chance to unlock a new character with a better/different skillset would have been ideal but instead we’re left with unlocking stuff for unlockings sake.

Similarly, the leaderboards which have been included are perhaps the biggest waste of space I’ve ever seen in the game. As I touched on earlier, the Classic mode shows the top 23 players in the world and aside from the awkward number, I can just about live with that seeing as it would have been the way of the world back in the 80’s. The new version however shows the top 5 players for each level. That is it. No filtering option, no chance to see how your friends are doing and not even the possibility of comparing your own times. Chances are I’m never going to make it into the top 5 players in the world at any game, let alone this one.

qbert review pic 4

So, whilst it’s lovely to see the old guy back and doing what he does best, does Q*Bert make a splash with the modern day gamer?

Whilst I’m delighted to see my old orange friend arrive on Xbox One, he’s not rocked up without his faults. The Classic side of the game will probably tempt in a hardcore retro nut, but is really only there as a bit of a filler for the rest of us. That therefore leaves us with a rather simple playthrough of the Reboot; one that only really gets difficult because of the strange control scheme and odd spikes in complication. It will keep you busy for a weekend or so, but after that? If you’re obsessed with unlocking skins then you may well throw an extra day into it but don’t expect a whole lot more.

Q*Bert Rebooted isn’t @!#?@! , but then it isn’t great either.

Related: Let’s Play Q*Bert Rebooted on Xbox One!

 

Neil Watton
Neil Wattonhttps://www.thexboxhub.com/
An Xbox gamer since 2002, I bought the big black box just to play Oddworld: Munch's Oddysee. I have since loved every second of the 360's life and am now just as obsessed with the Xbox One and Xbox Series X|S - mostly with the brilliant indie scene that has come to the fore. Gamertag is neil363, feel free to add me to your list.

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