Whether you celebrate them or not, most of us know about these all-important festivities. Christmas, Easter, Oktoberfest, Thanksgiving and, most importantly, the Jeff Goldblum Day. Yes, that last one is an actual day in Pittsburgh. But there are other oddball celebrations, including those centred on pop-culture, like May the 4th celebrating the Star Wars Day or November 7th paying tribute to the Mass Effect series. It just so happens that there’s also a day celebrating underwear – the National Underwear Day on August 5th.
Of course, it might not pose the same historical and cultural significance as the Jeff Goldblum Day, but let’s be generous and put just a little more spotlight on the world’s sexiest piece of clothing. To celebrate National Underwear Day, this article is comprised of weird and kinky games from the land of the rising sun. Enjoy!
Kicking off the National Underwear Day we have Catherine by Atlus. Meet Vincent, a regular thirty-something dude who spends his time at the local bar with his bros and is dating Katherine. Responsible and grounded, Katherine is a young woman who wants to settle down and start a family. However, Vincent is in no rush to give up his freedom so he does what any other man his age would do. He goes to the bar, gets drunk and meets his salvation – Catherine. This blonde minx is the exact opposite of Katherine; she’s provocative and outgoing.
Vincent spends the night with Catherine, but unfortunately for him chaos ensues from there on out. He begins to experience recurring nightmares which make him realize that Catherine might not be the godsend salvation he seeks. Part visual novel and part puzzle game, Catherine is a unique release for multiple reasons. For one, console owners got different versions of cover artwork. Xbox 360 owners got treated to a box art featuring Katherine, while PlayStation 3 owners could gaze upon the playful Catherine.
What makes this particular game stand out and fitting for the National Underwear Day is its Collector’s Edition. Why? Well, while the European version was in no way unique or memorable, the American release of the game came bundled with a pair of white polka-dot boxer shorts. An exact replica of the shorts that Vincent wears in the game, in fact. Wearing them would more than likely look just as ridiculous as in the game, but in case all of your undergarments just so happen to be in the laundry, it’s an acceptable solution.
Gal Gun: Double Peace
Gal Gun is the physical embodiment of everything the Japanese video game industry stands for. It doesn’t promote a political agenda, it’s ridiculous, perverted and, no, it doesn’t care if you’re offended. Gal Gun plays out as a rail shooter in which you take control of Houdai, an unassuming and unpopular male student. During an exam, Houdai is struck by a cupid’s arrow which makes every girl fall madly in love with him. From there, it’s up to you to help Houdai fend off an army of teenage girls with an uncontrollable libido.
This is done by shooting them with arrows, subsequently subduing them. Sometimes, you must also rub the screen to make the girls… to make them… ahh, you get the point. Once again, the Mr Happiness edition of Gal Gun came along with something a little special. Little, quite literally. In addition to regulars, like a wall scroll and soundtrack, it included a screen cleaner. In the shape of female panties.
And that’s how it was advertised, as a microfibre cleaning cloth for cleaning that screen after all the fervent rubbing. So if you’re ever caught during a questionable act with these panties, just tell the truth, it’s a screen cleaner. Developers even went for a contingency plan in the PlayStation 4 and PC versions with a “Mom’s Arrived Screen” which changed the game’s appearance to that of a harmless RPG. As for the panties, you can try wearing them on your head, just like Kinda Funny’s Greg Miller did that one time. Better not though.
Pantsu Hunter: Back to the 90s
Unlike Gal Gun, Pantsu Hunter isn’t even trying to be inconspicuous about its subject matter. It’s all in the name. Pantsu Hunter is a story about Kenji, a young, albeit ego-centric, student who moves to the big city in order to attend university. Across multiple chapters, he helps out girls and begins to develop a close relationship with them. It becomes a story of finding the one true love.
To find his one and only, Kenji converses with each girl, partakes in different pastimes and… collects their panties to determine their owners’ personality. According to the game, white panties, for instance, indicate at a simple girl who doesn’t care what’s under her clothes. (This statement is in no way shape or form endorsed by me or TheXboxHub). Utilizing the aptly-named Pantsu Vision, you will assist Kenji in locating a number of different panties and bring them home for “research”.
On the surface, it’s a panty thief simulator. But beyond that, Pantsu Hunter is a beautiful anime-style visual novel with a chill 80s and 90s vibe and a matching soundtrack. Pantsu Hunter received a Limited Edition boxset by eastasiasoft which, sadly, didn’t capitalize on the game’s theme of panty collecting. However, anyone who pledged €145 or more for the game’s Kickstarter received a pair of “Handmade souvenir panties”. I’ve no idea what handmade panties are supposed to look like, but sounds fancy. Like a bar of organic soap from Lush.
Some would rightly say that it’s a steep price to pay for a pair of panties, but can you really put a price on love?
We’ve covered a lot of ground. In Catherine, you wear boxer shorts as Vincent. Gal Gun’s Mr Happiness edition includes a pair of panties doubling as a screen cloth and Pantsu Hunter is all about finding those undergarments. But let’s step it up a notch. In Panty Party, you are the panties! Yurika, the main protagonist of the game, is bestowed with unique powers which allow her to transform into a pair of female underwear. As if that’s not enough of a premise, she becomes the Warrior of Love and must battle other panties.
As to why is anyone’s guess, but the panty industry is an obviously competitive scene. In terms of gameplay and story, Panty Party is no contender for any meaningful awards. It’s really just a bunch of panties of all shapes and sizes brawling on the streets of Japan with no particular rhyme or reason. But just like the other games, it contained a little special something in one of its Switch boxsets.
This time, eastasiasoft published a Limited Edition of Panty Party to match the ridiculous premise of the game. Along with stickers of panties, it includes an actual wearable pair of female panties. That’s right, none of those “it’s a screen cleaner” excuses. Pink, soft and with the game’s logo on the back, it’s an excellent option for those who need both: a silly Japanese game and a new pair of underwear.
That concludes our list commemorating the annual occasion of everything underwear. Do you celebrate National Underwear Day? Have you played any of the games on the list or have others to add? Let us know in the comments below.